Saturday, February 5, 2011

Horsey. Hoping. Praying.


Right, I've gathered you all here today because Horsey's had a trot of bad luck.


We've all been with him from the beginning ... remember MMMC's little sister who played with us? Wasn't she a cutie like MMMC? 


Even though Horsey recently moved away from the farm to pursue his acting career, he's always been in our hearts.


Such a star!  


So glitzy!


What do you mean bad luck?


I don't know exactly what happened. One minute he's on the shelf, planning a 'family show' that'll reveal a secret he's known since November last year, next minute, he's found in pieces on the floor.


We're all getting brittle! It's been 30 years dammit! 

But Horsey's head was literally split in two like a coconut!


I'm worried about Horsey ... I don't know many toys who can come back from something like this ...

 

Gordon, what do you propose?

I think I need to speak to someone ... 

 
Stop everything! I'll help! 

Horsey was going to introduce ME on his family show! I'm his LONG LOST BROTHER! 


But, you don't look anything like him!


What are you suggesting? I am his half-brother ... the DNA test is irrefutable ... I'll donate my own head to Horsey if I must!


I can only think of one person who can help us.


Cupcake Jesus, what can be done for Horsey?


Gordon, I've heard about his accident ... Sad. I'm sorry, some plastics are just non-repairable with
glue ... Just doesn't hold.


Though I'll see what I can do, but I can't perform miracles all the time ... and, to be brutally honest, I'm stretched as it is ... 


For God's sake child, can you stop making inscriptions on the wall?


Yes, I mean you, Little Innocent-Looking One, with the scribe-tool in your hand!


If I have to get off the wall one more time to tell you boys to stop fighting on the couch!  By crikey! All Hell'll break loose!

 

It's hot as Hades today! You children will melt in those synthetic dress-up get-ups!


I'm sorry young Horse, I can't give your DNA test results some sort of 'Holy Authentification', you have to go through the proper bureaucratic channels.
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39 comments:

  1. annieFebruary 5, 2011 at 6:48 PM

    Is Martha scribing in tongues? She may be a bit "Beautiful Minds" with the Aramaic maths. Careful she isn't stigmatacised by the scribe tool. Watch what you are doing, child!
    She may be relieved to hear your surprise- since- November is a brother for Horsey not her.

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  2. objectsofwhimsyFebruary 5, 2011 at 6:57 PM

    BWAAAHAAAAHAA!

    AHHHH! I love aussie flavoured humour.....nothing beats it! Fuelled by heat and humidity it can be in its delivery shocking to some, a fast moving missile to others. But to us fuelled by seasonal insanity its hilarious and just right.

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  3. KerryFebruary 5, 2011 at 7:32 PM

    I have only one thing to say to you...your talents will be completely and utterly wasted in the law :))

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  4. Frau SFebruary 5, 2011 at 8:47 PM

    This. Is. Hilarious. And MESSED UP. I LOVE IT!

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  5. melissaFebruary 5, 2011 at 10:51 PM

    JESUS CHRIST, i think you need some WD40 for that. As for horsey i dunno, 'stippy tape' works wonders around here.

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  6. JoFebruary 5, 2011 at 11:18 PM

    I love cupcake Jesus - I am going to see if we have one of those in our collection. Looks like he is very useful!

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  7. TraceyFebruary 5, 2011 at 11:37 PM

    You're absolutely hilarious ... you kept me laughing the whole way through ... while of course at the same time feeling bad for Horsey...

    I think my grandparents had a similar 'Jesus' picture hanging on their wall as a child ... though I don't think he 'moved' about as much as that! ;)

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  8. Jane HoushamFebruary 6, 2011 at 12:45 AM

    I love it!It started out all Animal Farm and just riffed from there.

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  9. StellaFebruary 6, 2011 at 12:48 AM

    haha! Great, but I feel really sad about horsey...

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  10. brismodFebruary 6, 2011 at 1:59 AM

    Do you seriously take Jesus off the wall and remind your children that he's constantly watching? Hilarious!

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  11. Make mine Mid-CenturyFebruary 6, 2011 at 2:12 AM

    Brismod,
    No. I did it once or twice a while ago to the boys when they were mucking around. I haven't done it for a while ... Now he hangs in their room! The son who named him 'Cupcake Jesus' asked me the other day to take him down from their wall, so I may have to find another spot for him.

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  12. Raine and SageFebruary 6, 2011 at 2:26 AM

    Cupcake Jesus is hilarious! Bless. A good laugh here, which was much needed today. Thankyou Jesus.
    Sinead O'Connor sums it up best - 'Nothing Compares to You'. We miss you Horsey!

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  13. Sarah BFebruary 6, 2011 at 2:30 AM

    Gosh, you are a card Carmel! But still, how is horsey????

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  14. LittlemissairgapFebruary 6, 2011 at 3:45 AM

    CRACK UP!!!!
    Agree ... wasted on law.
    Storyboarding for the next FP Little People movie more up your alley!

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  15. Ariane ReichardtFebruary 6, 2011 at 7:17 AM

    My kids run to me, asking why I'm laughing loud?! Dear MMMC, Jesus, why "cupcake"? And I didn't know that Horsey was such an It-Horse!
    x Ariane.

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  16. DebFebruary 6, 2011 at 8:04 AM

    You are so crazy! Maybe Horsey could become a saint.

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  17. HeidiFebruary 6, 2011 at 8:05 AM

    You are a precious Goofball!!!!Loved the barn gathering! where is horsey???

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  18. Milady ProductionsFebruary 6, 2011 at 8:59 AM

    Hahahahaaaaaa! i love you!
    I want to see those animated.
    seriously.
    Its soooooooo good!
    A sort of corrupted Toy Story! Being raised Catholic myself, i can relate to Martha's expression.
    Its...well, scarey!

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  19. KLTFebruary 6, 2011 at 10:00 AM

    My side hurts! You are hilarious!!! :)

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  20. sarapiratFebruary 6, 2011 at 10:18 AM

    hehehe, you are FUNNY! cupcake jesus and day-days.
    those days also makes me go yuk...bla...grr....
    thanks for brightening up this eve!

    ♥

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  21. ElisabethFebruary 6, 2011 at 11:51 AM

    And this all ended with a cliffhanger! I can't wait, what will happen now???

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  22. bobbiFebruary 6, 2011 at 11:53 AM

    Cupcake jesus is definetly my kind of god. I could switch to being a catholic. One more post with cupcake jesus and I'll be done.
    There is someone in Norway who should write a poetic chlidren's book, but there is someone in australia that should really write a hilarious children's book. Do it.

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  23. CurlyPopsFebruary 6, 2011 at 1:04 PM

    I think we all need a cupcake Jesus in our lives!

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  24. annieFebruary 6, 2011 at 3:55 PM

    Nothing like those vintage F.P. personalities and the Jesus of the Cupcake to draw us all out of the woodwork, MMMC. You may have inadvertently begun the Cult of the Jesus of the Cupcake. I have a mind's image of one of Anna's cupcakes superimposed onto your blissed out Jesus image. Go on Anna, I dare you. You could print us all some holy pictures for the MMMC AGM ( to be held in Tijuana at a date yet to be announced...)

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  25. WendyFebruary 6, 2011 at 5:32 PM

    Do you think, perhaps, you could include a warning in your header when you'll be causing people to snort carbonated drinks through their noses and onto their laptops? Please???

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  26. MidcenturymadamFebruary 6, 2011 at 8:55 PM

    Well that just takes the (cup)cake. Jesus help us all if Horsey doesn't get his head together. That just cracked me up...no pun intended. Poor Horsey. Why does The Godfather keep popping into my head?? MMMC, you're brilliant!

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  27. objectsofwhimsyFebruary 7, 2011 at 3:03 AM

    but it does look like a cupcake that delicious blackforesty kind mmmmm!

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  28. RachelFebruary 7, 2011 at 6:49 AM

    AH MAZING!

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  29. Pinecone CampFebruary 7, 2011 at 8:48 AM

    This is completely insane, but I love it! Thanks for an early Monday laugh. Jesus.

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  30. Anna BartlettFebruary 7, 2011 at 2:11 PM

    Ah, but isn't the beauty of the cupcake all it's 'fleshy' glory? But I do agree, it could be a black forest cupcake. And I'm impressed that he wears cutoffs. Will have to send down the Billabong cowboy hat - it would suit your figure!

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  31. AnnFebruary 7, 2011 at 8:01 PM

    Ok so I showed your blog to my husband after he split his sides reading your comment on his previous favourite blog (mine). He now says he only has room for two blogs in his life and it appears he's dumped me for you... I just don't know why a plastic horse and a talking Jesus painting is so damn funny. But it is, isn't it?!

    I might dump my blog for yours too...

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  32. zigsmaFebruary 7, 2011 at 9:40 PM

    I'd like to hear bluer language from the Sacred Cupcake of Jesus please. And the irony: the glue didn't work for horsey, and that's where he'll end up, no? The glue factory. Or they shoot horses, don't they?

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  33. CloudbustingFebruary 7, 2011 at 10:31 PM

    Thanks for making me laugh, I was feeling depressed and missing my son, who has started school. You are hilarious!!

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  34. Paper Tree StudioFebruary 8, 2011 at 2:09 AM

    Oh you always make me laugh!! Super glue to the rescue ???!! Michelle

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  35. theoldboathouseFebruary 8, 2011 at 2:18 AM

    Praying for horsey but MMMC children they are patty cakes...remember... Patty cakes.ha I fear I am the only person in Australia that still calls them this and insists that their children still call them this despite them saying "Mum who cares?" followed by " Mum, the aren't called that now?" ha. I find these little erosions of my child hood sad, ha.... Oh say can you see by the dawn's early light..ha

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  36. theoldboathouseFebruary 8, 2011 at 2:49 AM

    We must have been leaving comments for each other at the same time...syncronicity xx

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  37. Laura, Happy Homemaker UKFebruary 8, 2011 at 5:27 AM

    Horsey! Horsey! Horsey!

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  38. AnonymousFebruary 8, 2011 at 4:54 PM

    Hugh Laurie is thinking of horsey too
    http://www.daemonstv.com/2011/01/11/house-carrot-or-stick-season-7-episode-10-photos/

    India

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  39. Aussie-wafflerFebruary 9, 2011 at 12:20 AM

    Super K says "Hang on Horsey, I'll save you..just as soon as I've had my manicure."
    Love it :)

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